One-Shot Collection!
by xXxNaru-LovexXx
Summary: A series of one-shots that I have written myself! You guys deserved it - and yes, they are all rated T for three reasons: Blood, gore and violence, language and romance. No lemons guys. That is something I vowed to NEVER EVER DO. ALRIGHT! Hopefully somewhere between 5-10 chapters. Maybe even more...
1. Mai's Nightmare

**My very first one-shot Ghost Hunt fanfiction – I decided to have a horror/sadness theme for at least one of my stories… but anyway, I really wanted to try a one-shot while listening to creepy Ghost Hunt Soundtrack songs. Hope you all enjoy!**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Ghost Hunt. All credit goes to Toshio Masuda and Fuyumi Ono.**

_**Ghost Hunt One-Shot:**_ _Mai's Nightmare_

A brunette girl walked along the leaf-filled river, a photo of a woman in her hand. Tears fell from her eyes as she stared longer at the face there, the image of the woman burning into her eyes.

"…Why did you leave me..?"

She walked longer still until she reached the mouth of the river, the waves spilling over the rocky shore rapidly. Her feet ached with the pain of numbness on the cold autumn night, leaves blowing around in her wake. Her feet trudged through the leaves, moss and gravel until she reached what she was looking for.

A shrine, located at the end of the river, with a Torii arch and fox statues.

She dropped to her knees, her sobs beginning to die down. She placed the photo on the pedestal at the shrine. She wrote the name of the woman on the photograph.

谷山優子

(Taniyama Yuuko)

The girl cried for the woman in the picture, lighting four candles in her remembrance.

Walking back to SPR and sitting on the couch next to Monk and Ayako, grief and fatigue took over as she thought back to the day when she left her…

* * *

_Cherry blossoms fell from the trees in Shibuya, Japan as 12-year-old Taniyama Mai was walking home from another day at school._

_She fell upon the doorway of her house. "Hello?"_

_No one answered._

"_Mother?"_

_The girl walked around her home, a sudden sense of impending dread clutching at her heart. _Why isn't she answering me?

_She paced around the livingroom, looking for signs of her mother's whereabouts. A book, a picture, anything._

_Her attention turned to the TV._

_Turning it on, tears glazed over her eyes when she realized who was on the news._

"_地元の女性が死体で発見されました渋谷に戻る路地にある__. __人の隣人のように女性を主張__谷山_優子_-"_

_The girl pressed the power button once more, feeling as though she had done something wrong in her life – something that made her deserve this. Surely it was just a coincidence? Maybe it wasn't Mai's mother. Maybe it was just someone else who looks similar and lives in Shibuya. Yes, that's it. Mai's mother must be somewhere around the house…_

_She looked everywhere, though, and to no avail._

_This was it._

_Mai's mother had died._

_And she didn't even get to say goodbye._

_The image of the woman's broken and bloodied body filled her mind once more as she raced down the street, her cries echoing on every surface she could touch. People turned their heads to see the girl run, desperation and sadness clutching at her heart._

_She found a shrine with a Torii arch and foxes at the end of the river she had run down. Unfolding a picture of her mother she had always kept in her pocket, she put the picture on the pedestal and lit a candle._

_The girl would light one for her mother – one for every year on the same day that she passed. She wrote the woman's name at the top by her head, tears spilling onto the leaf-strewn ground below her._

"_Goodbye, mother."_

_She blew out the candle, a shaking hand over her heart as she wiped the tears from her eyes, silently promising vengeance for the person that did this to her._

Someone shook her awake.

Someone with a brown ponytail and stud earrings.

Monk stood in front of her, a hand on her shoulder. "Mai? Why don't you go home and get some rest?"

Mai nodded, plastering a fake smile onto her face and walking slowly out the door to return home.

* * *

**Alright then! The first one-shot done. I tried to incorporate what I thought maybe could've happened to Mai's mother in the anime – it never tells you, however. I think that was Fuyumi Ono's way of saying: "Here! Let the fanfic people have a space to make creativity flow when writing about Mai's mom!"**

**If only.**

**Anyway, have a great weekend everyone and leave a review if you liked it! If you have any suggestions for any other serieses (series's, series, serieses…I DON'T KNOW, WHATEVER.) I should write a one-shot about, PM me and I'll get back to you as soon as possible!**

**-xXxNaru-LovexXx**

**P.S. The writing for the newscast in Japanese is as follows:  
"A local woman was found dead in a back alley by Shibuya Japan. Neighbours of the woman claimed the body as Taniyama Yuuko."**

**P.P.S. I know it was really short, but how could I have made it any longer?**


	2. Naru's Nightmare

**Hey all! Just another one-shot I thought of. And yes. I'm obsessed with Ghost Hunt. BUT – I know that Naruisawesome and theflamingrose are too, so…**

**We're good.**

******DISCLAIMER: I do not own Ghost Hunt. All credit goes to Toshio Masuda and Fuyumi Ono.**

**Enjoy!**

_Ghost Hunt One-Shot: Naru's Nightmare_

Naru sat on his leather chair at SPR, feeling a headache coming on after a hectic day at work. Mai sat opposite of him on the small ottoman the girl always occupied, looking over some paperwork she had to fill out.

"I'm going home now, Naru. I'll fill it out there, I promise." She pointed at the work. "See you later!"

Naru nodded slightly in agreement, sitting up in a hunched-over position. He put his hands over his eyes to cover the light that spilled in from the tall windows, wishing he could stand to close the curtains. But there he sat, feeling a wave of fatigue wash over like the vast seas of Japan.

He closed his eyes, wanting to get away from it all.

But that wouldn't work.

Not in a million years…

_Naru walked down a winding road at night, someone almost as old as him walking next to him. Naru looked up at the teen, minutes older than himself. The same colour of hair spilled over his pale face, seemingly jet-black against that of the night sky._

_The sound of tires on gravel carved through the quiet air. The other man switched places with Naru, not wanting the younger of the two to be harmed if the car came close to him._

"_Sounds like a loud car." The older joked. Naru simply scoffed slightly at his brother's odd sense of humour._

_The sound became louder as the vehicle came closer. Naru turned around slowly in time to see a red sports car drive quickly beside him._

_**Thump. Thump.**_

_What was that?_

_Naru's heartbeat quickened when he realized that the other boy was no longer beside him._

Where did you go, Eugene?

_Naru looked around the area where he was. He hid behind the tree so the driver could not see him in plain sight. No doubt that his black clothing would make him camouflage with the trees…_

_The woman who drove the car clambered out quickly to see what the noise was. She ran to the front of her car. Screaming loudly, she opened the car door and reversed quickly._

_What Naru saw underneath the car made his heart skip into his throat._

_Under the tires lay something…_

_Something that sparked a memory in Naru's mind…_

_Eugene lay under the car, blood covering his face and clothing. He was barely recognizable. Even to Naru, who was his _twin.

_Before Naru could run up to him and move him out of the car's path, the lady slammed on the gas pedal, sending the car forward faster than it had gone before. She ran Eugene over again. _

_Purposely._

_She didn't want him to be alive to tell the tale._

_Naru watched in a horrified trance as he saw his brother being trampled by the car's filthy tires once more, the sound of crushing bones cracking the silence of the dusk, blood flying in all directions._

"_E-Eugene…" Naru whispered, tears burning behind his eyes. Something the teen wasn't familiar with. "No…"_

_The woman climbed out of her car again to see if she had successfully killed him. She peered at his face, his hair covering his eyes, which were still open, even after death. She ran briskly to her trunk, pulling out a yellow tarp and wrapping him in it._

_Seemingly for hours, she left and came back constantly, filling the tarp with stones. Naru wanted to go back out and see Eugene, to comfort his twin during his last moments, but his feet could not find the strength to move. The woman wrapped Eugene in the tarp and closed it up – except for around his face, which Naru could now see._

_Looking into his brother's eyes, Naru became lost. Until…_

_Eugene blinked._

He's not dead…

He isn't dead…

What's she going to do to him?!

_The woman grabbed the tarp, unaware that she had someone watching her every movement. She picked Eugene up in the tarp, and carried him with great struggle. She stopped at the edge of a cliff overlooking the lake the road lay by._

_It had to be a 78-foot drop, at the least. Naru watched in a terrified trance as he saw his brother being thrown into the lake, time in slow motion, seeing the tears stream from his face as his body plummeted into the lake._

_He would be breathing now for the last time…_

Naru jumped slightly and opened his eyes.

He sat in an empty office, thankfully. Although he had become quite accustomed to there being someone or some sort of sound in the room at all times, he was grateful that at least now he was alone and quiet.

Shaking his head, Naru stood from the chair, headache gone, but replaced by the screaming of his brother's final moments on this earth.

Naru looked down at his feet when he reached the doorknob to his house.

Deep inside, he still felt a certain coldness that no warmth could touch.

**What a story! I loved doing the one-shot for Mai's nightmare and death and stuff, so I figured, "Hey. Naru's had some pretty creepy and dark things hidden in his past too, so – let's do this!"**

**Anyway, it's Thursday and I'm happy, so…**

**Have a good week,**

**-xXxNaru-LovexXx**


	3. Can't Remember to Forget You

**I'm doing a fanfic where you write while listening to a song. This selection was "Can't Remember to Forget You" by Shakira, and I hope you all love it! It includes an OC of mine so I can add this one to the community!**

**Character Profile:**

**Name: Shito Seikatsu**

**Sex: Male**

**Age: 16**

**Hair: Blonde, short crop, no parting.**

**Eye Colour: Green**

**Personality Type: Occasionally hot-headed, but had a lot of patience. Loves being around people unless upset about something. Talks too much, too often. Is mostly quiet, but can be loud when wants to be. Not easily scared, rather more brave than most people. Gets embarrassed easily. Polite. Talks with his hands.**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Ghost Hunt. All credit goes to Fuyumi Ono.**

**Enjoy!**

_**Ghost Hunt One-Shot: **__Can't Remember to Forget You_

Mai walked into the school's main building, nothing but class on her mind. After all, Naru _had_ told her not to skip classes to avoid being any more stupid, the jerkface.

_WAIT – I wanted to forget all about him! What am I doing?!_

Mai slapped a hand to her forehead in frustration and walked faster down the hallway, wanting to evade all thought of the teen. Her bag whipped from her shoulder when her pace picked up and fell to the ground. Papers from yesterday scattered everywhere.

Mai stopped for a moment, contemplating whether or not she should pick up her bag or leave it there for the rest of the semester; the thing was hard enough to carry around all day and Mai felt her shoulder cry out in happiness that its burden had been lifted.

Ever since Mai's job at SPR, she had never gotten any free time to actually make sure that her shoulders were okay – Naru always made her carry the heavy shelves.

But yet again, the boxes he carried weighed almost 100 pounds, so she couldn't complain.

_Wait a minute. I'm thinking about him again, aren't I? DAMNIT!_

Mai bent down to snatch up her bookbag when she heard footsteps from down the hallway.

"Need some help there?" The stranger spoke softly. Mai knew for sure that the person speaking to her was a boy; his voice was very deep.

The boy dipped down at her side and picked up the papers that scattered when the bag dropped to the ground. He propped the bag upright and placed them gingerly inside, letting his hand waver over the place longer than it normally would've been had the person not have been a pretty girl.

"Thanks." The said brunette looked up into the eyes of the boy who helped her.

"My pleasure. My name's Shito. Shito Seikatsu." The boy blushed, eyes wide.

_There's something odd about his name. _Mai's inner voice said. _Think about it!_

"Alright then. I've heard about you before. Sensei told me that you moved here from Okinawa. Is that true?"

"Yes, I moved here from there, you know, as you said. Hah…hah." He laughed awkwardly, rubbing his right hand behind his head, still blushing furiously.

_When he mentioned the phrase 'here from there', Shito used his hands to measure distance. He's quite the guy!_ Mai laughed silently.

"B-but anyway, which classes do you have next?"

"I'm off for break in five minutes, I've skipped my class talking to you." Mai looked down at her watch.

"Oh, I-I'm sorry. What… are you doing for break?" Shito stuttered.

"Nothing really." Mai responded coolly, not looking up at him.

"Well, would you… like to go with me for lunch?" He asked nervously, blushing redder than ever before.

Mai thought where she stood, her eyes narrowing at the prospect. _If I go out with him today, it will give him false hope. If I don't, it will make him upset. I… guess I'll just have to make an excuse then._ Mai scowled at herself, but looked again up at Shito.

"Umm… I'm kinda already… _with_ someone." She said 'with' as if she were dating someone else.

"Oh, then… I guess you don't want to. Well, see you later then, Mai." The boy turned heel and stalked away slowly.

It made Mai slightly sadden to think about what she just did to Shito – he really seemed to like her.

_Hold on…_

_How did he know my name?! I never told him what my name was! How-_

Shito stopped at the end of the hallway and began a conversation with someone.

Someone very tall… and with dark hair.

Someone wearing a white shirt and vest.

Someone Mai could only describe as Lin Koujo.

He stared at her for a moment, smiling and laughing, then wheeled around and walked out of the school.

Mai blushed in angry embarrassment. _Did Lin set this up?_

Mai stomped off to her classroom and meet Michiru and Keiko, bookbag in hand. She swung the door open, face red even still. The girls looked over at her, then smiled and waved.

Michiru glanced at Mai's face for a moment, then realized what had just happened. "There was a boy, wasn't there?"

"Yep. His name is Shito."

"Ooh!" Keiko cried. "Was he cute?"

"I.. I guess you could say that – THAT'S NOT THE POINT! The point is that I made up an excuse to not go out for lunch with him. You know what I said?"

"What?" Her friends spoke in unison.

"That I was with someone else!"

"But… you're single, Mai. Why would you say that?" Keiko asked quietly.

Mai looked Keiko in the eye and thought for a moment.

_Yes, I'm not dating anyone. But… why would I even say that in the first place?_

Mai's thoughts immediately jumped to Naru. The way he smirked, walked, talked, even smiled occasionally. It made her blush.

_Ugh! THAT'S why! I was thinking of Naru when I said I was dating someone else!_

_WHY?! I thought I promised myself I would forget him..!_

Mai stopped staring at Keiko and shook her head. "I don't know."

She sat down at her own desk, staring out the window, her head resting on her right arm. She instead thought of everyone at SPR, her friends – family.

Even Naru.

**Wow. I just randomly thought of that while listening to Shakira. **

…

**Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed and you will follow me to see some more great stories!**

**Yours truly, **

**-xXxNaru-LovexXx**

**P.S. Shito's name – first and last – was inspired by the concept of life and death. Shi = Death, To = To, Seikatsu = Life.**

**And now you know.**

**Well, anyway, have a great long weekend and Victoria Day (Canadians only XD)**


	4. Haunt You Every Day

**Hey all! I was listening to some songs earlier and one called "Haunt you Everyday" by Weezer tickled my fancy.**

…**Tickled my fancy?**

**The song just SCREAMED NaruxMai! NaruxMai!**

**So I obliged happily and this is the product. I would suggest listening to the song while you read – it will make the story better for you. I'll let you know (in the story) when to play it. It can be found on YouTube, Grooveshark and any other music sharing/video website.**

**Enjoy!**

_**Ghost Hunt One-Shot: Haunt you Everyday**_

_Naru knocked on the office door of SPR, clutching his left arm, which was covered in blood, his shirt torn open in the area under his hand._

_Two people answered his call at the same time – Mai and Lin's heads poked from around the corner of the door. Their eyes widened significantly when they saw why Naru was there in the first place._

_**(Play it here.)**_

_Lin picked Naru up with surprising ease and rushed to the livingroom with him. He sat the teen down on the couch, who collapsed onto the arm, face paler than ever._

"_You're losing so much blood!" Mai cried, sitting on the floor beside Naru, putting a gentle hand on his forehead. She brushed some of his silky hair away from his eyes._

_They seemed… angry. Shocked._

I don't feel the joy… I don't feel the pain…

_Tears rolled down Mai's pale face as she looked into Naru's eyes, staring at a place behind her, glazed over and expressionless. He seemed to be lost in thought, a look of agony and terror flashing suddenly across his face as if he had remembered something terrifying._

_And yet a single tear did not fall from his bloodshot eyes._

_Naru raised his bloodied arm to place it on Mai's auburn head. He blinked slowly, terribly slowly, and simpered slightly, his face as mangled in places as his arm._

_Mai smiled at the man's courage – the fact that he's still living and breathing, able to show Mai any affection whatsoever was a miracle. Mai blinked, placing a gentle hand on his upturned shoulder._

_He flinched suddenly, feeling electricity between their touch, but succumbed to the feeling and closed his eyes again as Mai silently cried and prayed that he stay alive. "W…where is…L-Lin..?" The teen whispered._

"_He's j-just phoning the h-hospital, Naru, h-hold on, p-please!" Mai cried. "D-don't die! You can't!"_

_He nodded slowly, moving his hand away from Mai and grimacing in pain._

_Lin ran into the room, cell phone in hand. "There's an ambulance coming now!" His voice echoed, tall frame bent over in anxiety._

Oh, so alone in love…

_Mai nodded vigorously and waited for the sound of the sirens and the red and blue lights soon to flash through the windowpanes. She sat beside Naru as he breathed deeply every few seconds, seemingly holding on to dear life only by a thread. Each breath he drew within wracked his body in massive shudders._

_The carpet below Mai was as wet as her eyes; she still cried, waiting for the ambulance to come. She rubbed her eyes every once in a while. Lin had joined her now, sitting on the ottoman beside Naru, his head buried in his hands._

"_This is my fault." His voice muffled through his large, pale hands._

"_How?" Mai sobbed. "You weren't there when it h-happened…"_

_The man stayed silent for a moment. He released his hands from over his face and placed them on his lap. "…I sent him to go where he was. I didn't know this would happen though…" His voice cracked slightly._

Even Lin is worried…

I mean, he is Naru's mentor…

_Mai bent down beside Naru, her hands covering her eyes, tears streaming down like blood from Naru's arms. She rested her head down on her hand, which was on the man's shoulder. He didn't acknowledge that the girl was getting him wet with her tears – as long as he had the chance to… "comfort her" before he died, he didn't care about anything else._

_Yes, Naru knew that he was possibly spending his last moments alive with Mai. Nothing else mattered now – the only thing he could see and hear was Mai crying on his shoulder. He wanted so badly to reach out his hand and embrace her, to feel her heart beating against his own, to see her tears dry._

_But no matter what, if he died, she wouldn't be able to bear the grief._

_Naru's lips parted weakly. He whispered so Mai could hear him, but only Mai. "If…I die tonight-"_

"_No, Naru, don't t-talk like that! You're g-going to live! Promise me!"_

"_Wait, Mai…If I do…I want you to know… that I…" Naru's sentence was cut short; blood trickled out of his mouth very slowly. Mai screamed quietly beside him, Lin rushing over to him with a handtowel._

_The sound of sirens could be heard from outside the office. _

"_Ambulance…" Mai muttered._

_Two men in uniform knocked briskly on the door, stretcher in their hands. They hurriedly lay Naru down inside the long object and ran him outside and into the back of the ambulance._

_Mai attempted to climb in behind him, but one of the paramedics put a hand on her shoulder, preventing her from entering. His low voice rang through the night air._

"_You can't go through here, miss."_

"_I'M COMING WITH HIM!" She cried and broke free of his grip. She sat down beside the stretcher on the seat in the back, her hand clasped over Naru's right one. The paramedic didn't respond, just went to the front seat and drove quickly to the hospital._

When will stupid learn; fire's gonna burn?

_Naru seemed to be asleep; eyes squinted close either from fatigue or excruciating pain. The indigo eyes that made one of his beautiful characteristics opened very slowly now, staring at the white roof of the ambulance. The hand that Mai gripped so tightly let loose. She shifted on her seat, happy that Naru was at least breathing now._

_The man let go of her hand for a moment; but only to grip hers himself._

_Tighter than Mai had ever done to him._

_The girl jumped back a little in surprise, but not as to disturb Naru or his injuries. Why is he doing this?_

_Naru's lips parted again. He looked like he had something on his mind._

"_I need to tell you… what happened to…me."_

_He tried to sit up; Mai ushered her hands over his chest to push Naru back down onto the stretcher, blushing furiously all the while._

How can I feel so delighted?! He's probably…

Dying…

…Now…

_Tears fell down Mai's pink face once more as she listened to Naru._

"…_I was in the mountains for a new case. Lin sent me." He collected his breath and began to explain his story. "I was… near the location of the base and… I saw this woman. She… had long blonde hair…and a red dress. Looked like dancer." He paused to catch his breath again. "I walked up to her. Thought…she was lost. I touched her shoulder, and… she clawed me. Poisonous claws…" His voice cracked. "I am now certain that it was Yama-Uba."_

"_Yama-Uba as in the dancing creature that kills mountain adventurers." Mai whispered. "Looks like a dancing woman, kills like a hungry bear."_

"_Yes." Naru coughed. Scarlet red painted the white stretcher and his black clothes. Mai recoiled in shock. She rummaged through the ambulance's medicinal cupboards and found a cloth that he could dry the blood with._

_Minutes later, they arrived at the hospital, Lin's black van following through the night._

_Naru was rushed into the ICU, Mai waiting for access into the room._

_The only thing she heard from outside the room was bloodcurdling and pained screams._

_All from Naru._

_Mai cringed each time a sound could be heard such as a door opening; she wanted to hear something about Naru, but any rational person wouldn't want to think he was dead. No, Mai knew that he would live._

_He had to. Mai wouldn't be able to live with herself if she let him die. What kind of friend would she be?_

Friend. Sounds like an odd word when I think about Naru. I want so much more from him…_ She stared down the hall at the door, wanting to see it open, wanting to see Naru walk out of it, alive and well._

_She wanted to see him again._

_She couldn't bear being away from him for this long and not hear anything._

_The door, as Mai hoped, opened slowly, a blue-and-white-clad doctor strolling out. "Miss Taniyama, you may see him now." He said quietly._

_She walked – as fast as she could without running – to the room. The door was ajar slightly, a sliver of light shimmering in the corner of the golden wedge on the marble floor. Mai opened it more so she could walk in._

_Naru sat up in the bed, wearing a white hospital gown, paler than ever. His indigo eyes were hidden behind an inky blue veil until the girl walked closer to him. He looked up at her before she sat completely down beside him in one of the hospital's chairs. She outstretched her hands to wrap them around his, and the man made no protest._

"_I'm sorry, Mai." Naru whispered quietly._

"_For what?" She replied._

"_I made you worry about me. I made both you and Lin fear for my life. But you don't have to worry anymore."_

"_What do you mean, Naru?"_

"_I won't live much longer. Then you don't have to worry about whether I'll be here or not."_

_The words echoed in Mai's mind._

"I won't live much longer…"

"You won't have to worry about my life…"

He'll be dead…

_Mai pushed herself closer to Naru. "Don't talk to me about that… You know it makes me upset."_

"_But then I won't be there to upset you. To make you fear for others' lives, make you cry again." Naru stopped for a minute, looking down at his lap in shame. "That hurt me more than you, Mai."_

Walking on my own; leaving you behind.

_Mai let loose her hands from Naru's. "I always knew that. Those who don't care now…"_

"_Once cared too much." He finished for her._

_The brunette looked now into Naru's eyes, leaning in closer to his face. They were nose-to nose._

_Naru's eyes closed rapidly. That wasn't the way that someone prepared for romance._

_That was how someone died._

_Mai recoiled now, tears in her eyes._

He's gone…

_She kissed his frozen lips passionately, something she had never done once while he was alive._

_Something that she was too stupid and ignorant to do while she had the chance._

_And now that he was gone, Mai didn't know how to cope._

_Her parents left her, now Naru._

_She intertwined her hands with the cold, dead ones that belonged to Naru before stroking his cheek and walking quietly out of the room._

_Mai heard something behind her. It sounded like a voice. She turned round to see – Naru sat up now, whiter than the sheets that bound him._

"_I'm going to haunt you every day." He whispered, but Mai could hear him perfectly._

_The girl stared in shocked silence at the man who was just recently dead, laying back down again and closing his eyes, no sign of his chest rising or falling and his nostrils flaring while he breathed._

_He was truly gone._

Mai shot up in bed, eyes wide open, tears streaming. She clutched her chest, searching for air, and laid back down on the bed again. She calmed herself down, remembering that Naru was still probably at his house, sleeping away on his bed.

Unless…

**That was fantastic! So glad to have followers that read my stories – this one might be popular. No idea though. No promises..!**

**Anyway, thanks to everyone – especially Naruisawesome – the first to hear about this one-shot. Loveeee to all of my reviewers!**

**Yours truly,**

**-xXxNaru-LovexXx**


	5. Talk Nerdy To Me

**I was sitting at home, thinking about music…for some reason. And anyway, I started thinking about that song "Talk Dirty" by Jason Derulo and 2 Chainz. So…**

**Here's your MaixNaru one-shot tribute to the song.**

**Welcome to the wonderful (and intelligently stupid) world of Naru in this sequence of…**

**Talk Nerdy to Me.**

**P.S.: Some sexual references such as 'sugar.' You'll understand in a minute..! I figured this story needed a little bit of 'sugar' references because the song is about…'sugar.'**

**Get ready for some intense dumbassery.**

**P.P.S.: I will drop a sentence for when you should listen to the song with Mai's personal lyrics. Trust me, it's going to be GREAT.**

**So, without further adieu,**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

_**Ghost Hunt One-Shot:**__ Talk Nerdy to Me_

Naru sat in his 'lair' at SPR, reading a new book he had purchased about spirits. It seemed quite interesting, a novel by Bram Stoker that had never been released to the general public until now. Naru had managed to get his beautiful hands on a copy by using a new piece of technology via Internet called:

_**(Drumroll please…)**_

_ ._

And yet, of course, Naru already knew how to get around technological items.

I guess you could say he was the Master of It All.

Whatever 'It All' was.

* * *

The door opened and his clumsy assistant, Mai, walked in, teacup in hand. It seems that the girl had finally figured out that Naru wanted tea every hour and had a schedule.

Because it is a proven fact that every Ghost Hunter needs at least 8 litres of tea every day. It keeps Naru looking as fabulous as he is and also gives him the daily sugar intake that he needs without having to make any bargains with Mai!

She sat down adjacent to him, legs crossed. Mai sipped a teacup of her own, looking contented.

"So, Naru, you're reading a new book?" She smiled warmly.

"Yes. The author is Bram Stoker. This specific novel," Naru held the book up so Mai could see the cover. It read 'The Parapsychologist's Guide to Psychometry.' "had never been released to the public until yesterday."

"Then how come I've never heard any word of it?" Mai asked, confused. Her auburn eyes wandered up and down the book's cover, then hovered over Naru's indigo gaze. It hardened playfully.

"Because you're not interested in that kind of thing. Besides, you wouldn't believe how tragic a place the Depths of Dumb can be."

Mai huffed impudently and stood, pointing a finger to Naru's face. It was an inch from his nose.

"THAT'S IT! You're getting it now! Just- just… give me a minute!" Mai looked around the room, searching for something. It made no sense whatsoever to Naru until she pulled out a purple pen and a piece of note paper from his desk drawer.

She wrote frantically, pronouncing each word separately with each word written. "If-I-can't-curse-out-loud-I-will-write-what-I-have-to-say!" Her face was tomato red. "Here!" She folded the paper.

Naru watched with a humoured gaze as Mai shoved the piece of paper into his face. He accepted gladly, wanting to know what was on the girl's mind but also wanting to have an excuse to make fun of her again.

But only because he loved what she did when she was mad.

He unfolded the paper to see the purple writing inside. It read as follows.

* * *

_**Naru,**_

_**I swear to ****ing God – If I have to listen to your **** any longer, I'll go deaf! Make fun of me again and – you better ****ing believe me - you will suffer a very terrible, slow and painful death.**_

_**BESIDES – I cannot sink any lower into the "Depths of Dum", according to you!**_

_**Sincerely,**_

_**Your "stupid" assistant!**_

_**P.S. If you're going to use any lines on me, make sure they're not the s***ty old ones, but rather something new. I don't know how many times you've mentioned that place to me this year.**_

* * *

Naru held back a laugh when he read the note over again and again, each time his face going redder.

"Mai – you forgot the 'B.'"

She snatched the paper from his pale hands and ripped it to pieces, throwing them into the rubbish bin at the other side of the room.

"Now you don't have to read my 'imperfections' anymore." She stormed out of the room, fuming. Mai entered the salon area of the office and flopped onto the couch, her hands covering her face. She screamed silently with a black leather pillow over her face.

From his 'lair', Naru only heard few words.

Choice words of Mai's when she knew – or in this case, thought – Naru couldn't hear her.

"EGOTISTIC, NARCISSISTIC, ****ING BASTARD! If HE thinks that I will sit here and do NOTHING about him CRACKING ON MY S**T ANYMORE, he's DEAD WRONG!"

…_Yeah, she's mad now._

_And that's exactly how I like it here._

Naru pushed the door slightly ajar and peered out into the salon. Mai sat there on the couch, biting the pillow now. Naru couldn't help but smirk deviously at what he had done to his assistant.

_That's enough with the torture, Noll._ His inner voice told him. _I think you shouldn't make her mad anymore or she might explode._

Naru simply scoffed at her odd behavior and laughed quietly.

Unfortunately for him, Mai heard it. Her body snapped around so she could see her newest victim. Horror immediately flashed across his even-paler-than-normal face as he quickly turned around and slammed the door before she could lunge at him and let the disembowelment begin.

Mai jumped off of the couch and pounded on the door. "Naru, I'm done. I'm not angry anymore, trust me."

"And what if you're not?" Naru's voice carried through the oak door.

"Then you would die a terribly slow and painful death."

"…Alright." Naru opened the door and Mai stood there, tears in her brown eyes. She blinked quickly and one fell, racing down her pink cheek.

"I'm… I'm sorry, Naru." She sat down on the chair adjacent to Naru's desk as her face crumpled, buried in her hands.

Naru felt slightly abashed and angry with himself now. It was evident that he had taken everything too far, or that Mai had just overreacted. But yet again, he _did_ tease her all of the time, and it didn't seem very fair from Mai's end.

However, this, right here, is how Mai got every time she was mad.

First she would be terribly angry. Like kill-you-in-your-sleep angry.

Then she would get depressed, like she is now.

But after this, she would be just as happy as ever.

…Hopefully.

"You… you know why I'm mad at you right now?" Mai's voice cracked as she dried her tears with the palm of her hand. "Because I'm never able to…"

Naru sat in waiting for her response, pondering about what she would say next.

"…Understand you - because… You. Are. A. Nerd." She pronounced every word fluently with one single breath.

Naru looked slightly taken aback, his eyebrows reaching higher than ever before.

But nothing was compared to what Mai said next.

Actually, what Mai _sang_ next.

She crossed the room in two strides to pull out a CD player from inside Naru's desk. Whilst this happened, the only thought that ever crossed Naru's mind was _where in the hell did I get a CD player?_

She turned the thing on after plugging it in and inserted a CD of hers. She pressed Track 3 and stood in the middle of the room, arms swinging like she was warming up for a sport. She cracked her knuckles now.

"Mai, _what are you doing?" _Naru inquired, worried about the girl's health now.

* * *

_**(Play it now.)**_

The beat of the music started now.

Mai started to move her legs like she was preparing for a dance as well.

_"Naru. Hah hah!_

_Oliver Davis."_

His head snapped upwards.

_Get Nerdy on._

_"I'm that girl that you pick on, in the office too._

_First class seat in your van now, ride's uncomfortable. _

_Never know what you want or need, unless it's green tea!_

_Switched paper files on your laptop, now they're hard to read!_

_But around the world, you speak every language!_

_Everything has an explanation!_

_The only thing I don't understand is – when – you-_

_Talk Nerdy to Me."_

Mai began to list off every new word Naru had taught her at SPR to the beat of the song.

_"Retrocognition, astral projection, demons and clairvoyance._

_Retrocognition, astral projection, demons and clairvoyance._

_Retrocognition, astral projection, demons and clairvoyance._

_Retrocognition, astral projection, demons and clairvoyance."_

Mai threw her hands in the air in a questionable manner – now she just wanted revenge. Clearly she had been planning these lyrics for a long time, considering how terrifyingly accurate they were to Naru's persona. She started towards Naru now, dancing almost seductively.

And… it was working.

Naru's eyes widened.

_Get Nerdy on._

_"You know the terms for all ghosts, no idle thinking._

_Our conversations are long, you're too intelligent._

_I never know what you want, not a single thought!_

_Switched paper files on your laptop, you're gonna need a new one!_

_And around the world you speak every language!_

_Everything has an explanation!_

_The only thing I don't understand is – when – you –_

_Talk Nerdy to Me."_

_Retrocognition, astral projection, demons and clairvoyance._

_Retrocognition, astral projection, demons and clairvoyance._

_Retrocognition, astral projection, demons and clairvoyance._

_Retrocognition, astral projection, demons and clairvoyance._

Mai began to walk closer to Naru now, finger pointed directly at his face. She glared at him accusingly, but smiled all the while. Her hips swayed from side to side until Naru had to back up in pleasured alarm. He had to keep himself from outstretching his arms and inviting her towards himself.

**_Ichi._**

_Got no friends, you need one._

**_Ni._**

_You never have any fun._

**_San._**

_When's the last time you saw sun?_

**_Shi._**

"Okay, that's just rude payback." Naru smirked.

_Those black clothes, all for Gene though. So out of place you are thought a bozo._

_Give it a minute, you'll catch up. You are so distasteful I could throw up._

_International oral threats. Every time I'm somewhere with you, always makin' bets._

_Madoka said you'd never last a single minute in Japan if it wasn't for that. _(Mai pointed at herself.)

_Anyway, everyday I'm trying to get to you. Gotta say that you're dumb if you're rude to me._

_Anyway, everyday I'm trying to get to you! Gotta say that you're dumb if you're rude to me!_

_But around the world you speak every language!_

_Everything has an explanation!_

_The only thing I don't understand is – when – you-_

_Talk Nerdy to Me._

_Retrocognition, astral projection, demon and clairvoyance._

_Retrocognition, astral projection, demon and clairvoyance._

_Retrocognition, astral projection, demon and clairvoyance._

_If I have to hear another word from you, I will surely go deaf!_

* * *

Mai looked over at Naru as he repeated the words while she sang.

"What? I don't understand!"She sang.

Mai laughed as she turned the CD player off and tucked it back under Naru's desk. She walked up to him, her chest touching his, looking up into his face.

"You going to make fun of me ever again?"

"Possibly. I liked your dancing."

Naru bent down, cupped Mai's face with one hand, the other on her back, and kissed her passionately. She melted in his arms, eyes wide in shocked please. She formally accepted and responded with excited energy.

When they broke apart, a brisk rapping sounded at the door.

Lin walked in, smiling.

"So, Mai, I hear you finally got your payback."

He looked between the two, both blushing furiously as if Lin had walked in on them doing something freaky.

"And I suppose you also apparently got your lifelong dream." The man smiled and exited the room, closing the door quietly before beginning to type away on his laptop in the salon area.

Naru brushed the appearance off of his shoulders and glared at the clock. It read 5:28. "That was quite the show. You deserve a treat. What do you say to dinner tonight, Mai?" He smiled a genuine smile.

"Now that's something I can understand." She replied happily, a huge smile breaking her blank expression.

Naru grabbed hold of her arm and escorted her out the door and into the streets of Shibuya.

* * *

**How'd you like that one?! More vulgar than my other ones, yes, so it's rated T for a big reason.**

**And yet, I didn't squeeze a lemon in there! Yay for me!**

**'Cause if I did it would be rated M.**

**Heehee! See you all later!**

**-xXxNaru-LovexXx**

**P.S.: The site Naru used was Amazon, but the title of the website was blurred out for some reason. Copyright reasons, I guess.**


End file.
